Saturday, October 6, 2012


So earlier today I opened an email from amazon promising free audiobooks. It was some new feature connecting their kindle versions with audiobooks, but I finally signed up for's free 30 day trial. The reason I did it was to get JK Rowling's new book, A Casual Vacancy. I am a Harry Potter fan and even read the small book of tales from that world which Rowling published. So I was very excited for her first adult novel. I had no idea what it was about, just who wrote it. Still, it.was enough for me to sign up  I started listening as I was making breakfast and enjoyed the great writing and powerful imagery as I weighed my yogurt and pineapple. Unfortunately, about 15 minutes into the book there was a scene where the foul language made me so uncomfortable I had to turn it off. I was by myself and know I've heard worse language in my life, but I didn't want to bring that language around me. So I turned it off. Thank you audible for me not actually buying the book. JK, you're a great writer, but I think I'll stick to your children's novels.

Thursday, October 4, 2012

New Start

Earlier I wrote a bit about FA - food addicts in recovery anonymous. Well I've gone back to it. It truly may be the only solution for me. I've tried everything, even having gastric bypass surgery. It's been 2 1/2 years since my surgery. I'm still 45lbs smaller, but slowly gaining it all back. But worse, and more scary, is the diabetes. It's so out of control. I even went to the hospital last month because my blood sugar was so high. It was boring. And copays are expensive. So the next several times my blood sugar got high enough to go to the hospital, I just took care of it myself. So I've been doing FA, by doing I mean working with a sponsor, for the last two months. I've lost 11.8lbs. That's it. I'm frusttrated because I expected it to come off faster. And it probably would have if I stayed "abstinent" (I'll explain that in another post) every day. But it was maybe 1/2 of the days  that I ate right and the other half I seriously binged. But I made 3 days at one point, and I know I've made two weeks when I've done it before. Being in program for two months now is the longest I've stayed in. Maybe it's desperation.